Coffee

 

I noticed in two people (so therefore it's conclusive evidence) that around 30 years of age the coffee drinking begins.

I don't like coffee.
I never have.
It's the smell and the taste.
I'll take a hot chocolate instead.

But coffee feels like a grown up thing that is inevitable.
But it's gross.
But I used to think alcohol was gross.
Until I discovered Irish Cream.
So maybe it's just finding the right tasting coffee.

My mom buys in green coffee beans.
She roasts them.
She grinds them.
She drinks coffee.
I'm told by everyone who visits to try them that the coffee is amazing.

Still gross.

I went to the MD for a physical.
She commented on the softness of my breasts.
That was weird.
And then she explained that coffee drinkers tend to get sinew-y breasts.

Another reason not to drink the yucky brown coffee.

But now I'm closer to 30 than 29.
I know, I can't believe it either.
So now is the time to start drinking coffee, given my two person pool of evidence.
And my need for a quick caffeine kick in the afternoon - caffeine, something that didn't give that kick in the past - and if you know me personally then you're grateful for that!
And when it's super sweet and frothy and creamy - then I can drink that.
But super sweet froth cream with a dollop of coffee is elusive at home.
I can only find it in coffee shops.

I think I have all the necessary ingredients - fresh coffee beans, fresh cream .... honey, maple syrup, or sugar. We even have that frother/steamer thing but it doesn't seem to froth. My mom thinks it's because the milk is too fatty as our skimming capabilities are not as effective as it is for skimming milk on a commercial level. Or maybe we just don't know how to use the frother/steamer?

How do you get yummy coffee drinks at home?

Oreo Love (I knew it!)

 

I have more proof.
My husband is really trying to fatten me up.
My husband bought me not one, but TWO boxes of oreos for Christmas.
This was his Christmas gift.
From him.
To me.
This is not at all the same as a spice rack (that I love by the way and he's as excited as he can outwardly be).

No.
This is obvious: "I'm trying to fatten my wife"
I still haven't figured out his motivation.
Maybe it isn't a crime so there's no motivation?
What do you think?

And there's more.
Not only did he get me oreos ...
he got double stuffed (one package)
and triple stuffed (the other package)
I didn't even know they made triple stuff!
Oh! And triple stuff is stupendous.
I was nervous I wouldn't like it.
But I did.
Eat-it-all-in-one-day kind of like it.

And there's more.
He brought our children on this oreo-purchasing adventure.
What kind of message is he sending?
I know.
He is starting early.
Teaching them the mission of fattening up their mother.

Oh! And there's more.
My brother is in on it too.
Apparently my husband spoke with my brother and convinced him of the importance of fattening me up too?
I'm not sure.
I'm suspicious.
What I do know is that my brother gifted not one but TWO packages of oreos also.

But, the evidence is gone.
I ate it.
In a week.
No more oreos.
And my body is happy for that.

Oreos for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and snacks in between ... yum! But my body is mad at me for doing that.

 

I recently read in Mother Earth News that Michael Pollan said in Food Rules that Rule #39 is that you can eat junk food ... you have to make it yourself.
I found a recipe for oreos that's right on (the cookies were soft but the filling was exact).
Pollan's reasoning is that if you make the effort to make your junk food you won't consume so much.
Well, this is true for several reasons.
One is that you had to put in all this effort.
Another reason: when you realize the filling is equal parts shortening, butter, and powdered sugar ... it's a little off putting.

My husband is trying to fatten me up

When we first got together Ren Man said he never imagined being with someone so small.
I took offense to that.
I patiently explained that 5'4" is the average american women's height.
But I think he meant out, not up ... and I think he means to fix my "small" issue.
Here's how I figured it out:
~ As you know, he's an excellent cook. Generally our meals are gourmet. That doesn't mean yummy necessarily (I have an aversion to things like beans, kale, rice ... and yet they are cooked in this house, sometimes all at once!). And things you wouldn't think could be gourmet - well they are when Ren Man cooks them ... like pizza. Innocent pizza. But in the hands of Ren Man it turns into avocado tomato bacon pizza. What could be better?

~ And then there was the issue over the summer where Ben & Jerry's pints were on sale for some ridiculously low price. (This makes sense considering the surplus of milk available at the time.... but that's another issue). So Ren Man couldn't resist the sale ... and the problem is: I can't resist yummy food (I have no off button!) So 14 pints of delicious Ben&Jerry's later ...

~ And finally (as if you need more proof!) - he found the halloween candy sale. I knew he'd been looking for it but he hadn't found it.
And then he did.
Yesterday.
M&M's
Kit Kats
Really really we avoid packaged foods
oh yeah - and twizzlers! (these are the food item that I literally at 4lbs of in less than a week postpartum both times - being on a diabetes diet during pregnancy will do that to a person - make them eat 4lbs of twizzlers in no time ... I won't even mention the oreos!).

So there you have it.
All the proof you need to show that my husband is trying to fatten me up.
For what purpose, I'm not sure.
But I'm watching very closely to determine his motive.
I'll let you know when I find out.
And today - for the record - kitkat consumption= 3
okay... 4
hmmm?
fine.
fine.
It's been 5, okay?!?!
I told you - the off switch is missing!

Reflection

Went summer clothes shopping.
Love shopping.
Hate consumerism.
Sad that I love shopping.
Bought lots of cute things.
Trying to re-vamp wardrobe.
Bored with t-shirt and jeans look.
Feel immature at park with jeans and t-shirt trying to mingle with better dressed moms.
Try not to care.
Feel it only perpetuates "mommy wars".
Care non the less.
Plus, love to shop.
New clothes are cute.

While trying on clothes become quite confused.
My size ranges between various clothes FROM THE SAME COMPANY.
Must try on everything to ensure fit.
Would prefer to just grab cute-right-sized clothing as shopping with children requires speedy shopping.
But clothes vary too much in size.
Try on everything.
Convenient full length mirror in changing room.
No full length mirror at home.
Plus don't frequently have time to see self naked.
See naked self (really underwear-ed self) in mirror.
Shocked.
There is a pudgy belly.
Remind self that baby is only 3months old.
Remember that stomach quickly receded post baby #1- didn't expect to still have pudge.
But it's second baby.
Belly can't be expected to revert to non-stretched look when it keeps getting stretched.
Annoyed that baby bearing mommas bodies are not worshiped.
They should be!
Try to love belly.
Remember lovingly that two babies grew in there!
Women are amazing.
Despite this decide never to birth another child.
Try clothes on.
Clothes very cute.
Look great.
Hear baby talking with her grandmother.
Decide more kids are worth it.
Maybe.
Briefly fantasize about dream home birth.
Yes, more babies- at least one... no maybe two.... can I stop at two more?
Well, decide to wait until baby is older and we have adopted at least one.
Good plan.
Buy clothes.
Love them.