Friday, February 5, 2010

Dear Noah 3years9mos

Hello my-Noah-only-mine-I-love-you-by-yourself,
At least that's what you say about the people you love. It means that only you are allowed to love whoever the person is. Sometimes you get a bit upset when I tell you that I in fact also love Daddy, for instance, at the very same time as you.
To balance the sweetness out... my child, I don't know what to do with you sometimes! You're a bundle of intense emotions lately and you want what you want and don't want what you don't want and are so so certain about your feelings and then just as quickly the tears dry and you're thrilled with the option available to you. I've read this is a 4-year-old characteristic. I'm ready to be done already! You have had this overwhelming lingering cold that has kept you from school and so I was attributing it to that - and I'm still kind of hoping that's why you have been off.


And about school... you were thrilled to be going back after the holiday break but after a week+ of absenteeism as a result of illness you are happy to skip school. When we say: okay, Noah, time for school! You say: but I'm too sick *cough cough* see?
We do see. We see that you aren't always wanting to go to school. Interesting. You love telling me about it when you come home but getting there is a challenge.


You've been in to fighting - as in you want to "fight people". Guns come in to it, but more pushing. You said that we all have to stay close to each other, everyone in our family, so we'll be safe from monsters. Really, I don't know where this is coming from. I have ideas (ahem - certain males play video games in front of you), you have a couple friends that talk about monsters. I don't know. It's sad to hear you talk about wanting to fight. But maybe more sad when you are hit/sit on/etc and confused and not sure how to defend yourself. Don't think this means you spend your days being beaten up by other children- definitely not. But there was one time in particular this month that where another kid was hurting you... It's hard to know how to explain it all to you; that we don't fight, we use our words but that sometimes other people fight... it gets complicated.


You are rocking this older brother role! Okay, so sometimes you're rough with Del and she falls after being side-swiped by you and then refuses to receive a "help you feel better" hug, pat, help up, whatever. You find that a challenge. But for the most part the two of you are a pair. When you're at school she asks where you are and when she's napping you're asking about her and race to greet her when she wakes up. It's fun to see your relationship develop and watch as you look out for each other, play with each other, and yes, even argue with each other. Okay, so the last one isn't fun per se but still interesting to see that element in your relationship.


I love you mister: fighting, truancy, sickness, and all!

1 comment:

Shalonne said...

I too wonder how to handle the whole fighting thing when my kids get older. I certainly don't want my kids to start fights but, if someone starts one with them, I want them to feel like it is okay to defend themselves. The other person isn't always going to my kids walk away or just talk. I found this out the hardway when I moved from going to a very small school where no one got physical with each other to a much bigger school where people faught all the time. I heard a line in a movie once, I think it was "Changeling" where the mom told the son, never start a fight but always finish one, or, something like that. It seemed like maybe not good advice as in advice that I would be happy to give but the best advice available for a tough situation....kwim?